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> Adventures in Parodyverse - Special Election, Part 7
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> “What happened?â€Â Anna asked as she looked around her at the Lair Legion lying on the carpeted floor of Hatman’s office in various poses. It looked like they all simply fell asleep where they lay.
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> The Spin was long gone. With his talents, he could be miles away and still accomplish his mission.
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> Being artificial like Anna, Hallie was conscious enough to answer her question. “Marvellous Marv’s shtick is to trap people in a collective dream. Looks like that’s what he’s doing now. That’s why he’s not reacting to us either. I guess he needs to be asleep too.â€Â
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> “I’m going to have to kill him, aren’t I?â€Â Anna whispered sadly.
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> “No!â€Â Hallie insisted emphatically. “We can’t! If Marv dies...or even slips into a coma...the Lair Legion will be trapped in their own minds. Eventually something in the collective dream might kill them, and their hearts might stop.â€Â
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> “They all seem agitated.â€Â Anna noted as she checked their vital signs. “Maybe even scared. I wish I could help them.â€Â
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> “Maybe we can wake up Marv without harming him.â€Â Hallie replied. “We should try at least. Who knows what kind of trouble the Lair Legion is in.â€Â
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>
> ---
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> The Human Tank hit Hatman hard. He made an ‘oof’ sound, and doubled over as he realized just how painful a super-powered hit can be when he has no protection from his own abilities. Fortunately he’d taken enough such hits with protection that he knew to brace himself with his abdominal muscles so he didn’t take serious injury.
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> “Stand aside.â€Â the Psychic Samurai half-requested, half-ordered. Her sword was missing in this dream, but she was calm and focused. As she told Hatman once, her body is the weapon, the sword is only a limb.
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> “Chiaki, you’re going to get hurt!â€Â Hatman groaned hoarsely. He looked at Dream, who was looking up and tapping his chin. He wondered what the Wired Wonder was doing.
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> He then looked sympathetically at Yuki, who was looking at her hands, stunned that she was human again, and so weak. The purple-haired woman didn’t seem to even be paying attention to what was going on. They were in chaos and disarray.
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> Con, as usual, was useless, leaning against a wall of the alley and smoking. Liu Xi, Danny, and the others were missing, possibly trapped somewhere else.
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> The Human Tank took a clumsy swing at Chiaki and missed, as she barely dodged his arm. In a blurt, she grabbed that arm, planted a knee firmly on his chest, and leaned back over her other foot, launching the super-villain in a perfect throw. He came to a crash landing in a group of trash cans in the alley.
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> “Wow, that was...â€Â Hatman whispered, forgetting his pain for a moment. He was impressed at the small Asian woman’s skill.
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> “...a dream.â€Â Chiaki finished his sentence. “It is controlled by will alone.â€Â
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> “F--- YEAH!â€Â CrazySugarFreakBoy! loudly agreed.
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> Hatman gasped when he realized why his best friend was so loud. He had become a twelve foot tall Transformers robot. CSFB! obviously got Chiaki’s point, and was using it to his maximum advantage.
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> “With his imagination, I should have known.â€Â Chiaki said casually as she rolled her eyes. She ignored the Human Tank’s anguished cry as he was thrown out of the alley and into the wall of the building across the street.
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> Jay realized why Chiaki remained so low profile - she believed her ‘art’ of sorts was her perfect form. CSFB! thought much farther out of the box. While Jay was trying to work up the willpower and think of something to become, Lara interrupted him.
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> “Jay, Con.â€Â Lara Night clasped their hands gently. “Forget that. Let’s try a more direct approach.â€Â
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> He then realized what she was trying to do. Rather than fight whatever Marv was sending their way, they were taking the battle directly to him.
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> Marv didn’t seem fazed at all that he was now visible in the middle of an old, crumbling street in Gothametropolis, facing the Lair Legion. He thought they were powerless. It made no difference to him that he was now seen.
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> “HE WHO DINGS THE SHELL MUST PAY!â€Â CSFB! yelled. He was now a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle...but as he drew his steel weapons, he suddenly realized he was suddenly too small and too unarmed to do as he promised. “Aww, you had to ruin it for me didn’t you?â€Â
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> “My will is greater than all of yours!â€Â Marv warned them. He stood aside and revealed a phantom of the Spin behind him. “I don’t intend to harm you,â€Â he said. “But you will remain here until you bend to my whim.â€Â
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> “I don’t bend over for nobody but April!â€Â CSFB! protested. He doubled over and clawed at his mouth as it suddenly became sealed shut.
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> “I assume you’ve seen the Matrix.â€Â Marv turned and mocked the Wired Wonder. “You should appreciate the irony, then.â€Â
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> Marv’s smile disappeared when he turned back, and the Psychic Samurai was standing directly in front of him. Without a word, she hit him in the center of his chest with an open palm, which threw him into the wall behind. He crumbled into a puddle of water that wasn’t there before.
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> “You should follow your own advice.â€Â Chiaki taunted him. She smiled and waved her arms in a circle, and then took a ready pose. She waved two fingers in his direction, daring him to fight back.
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> Marv looked down at himself, and realized that he was unusually soaking wet for such a small puddle...
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>
> ---
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> “He didn’t wake up.â€Â Anna commented. She was holding an empty bucket of water, and Marv’s clothing was soaked through.
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> “His brainwaves have changed.â€Â Hallie noted. “It did something. I think he can feel it.â€Â She looked at the rest of the Lair Legion. “And if he can feel things...â€Â
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> ---
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> “Chiaki is so freaking cool.â€Â CSFB! commented out loud once his mouth was working again. The silence didn’t last long.
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> “What do you hope to accomplish?â€Â Marv argued with the Psychic Samurai. “Perhaps you can resist my will...for a while--â€Â
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> “Mr. Anderson.â€Â Dream added, and then he giggled.
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> Marv ignored him. “--but my will is still greater than yours.â€Â
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> He then stared blankly as Hatman started coughing and sputtering suddenly. He then disappeared.
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>
> ---
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> “You were right.â€Â Anna told Hallie as Hatman awoke coughing. “The human ice water gag reflex is strong.â€Â
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> “What...?â€Â Hatman asked, shaking and confused. He looked around the room and started to put everything together - it didn’t take him long to recover his senses. “Wake...wake Lara up next.â€Â he said, pointing. “She can--â€Â
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> “I got it.â€Â Anna replied. She understood his point - Lara had the ability to create the same shock reflex on everyone in the room at once using electricity. She threw the next bucket of ice water in Lara’s face.
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> The blonde awoke, sputtering and coughing as Hatman did. Then she looked around the room. “Chiaki--â€Â she said. “She won’t be able to hold out long--â€Â
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> “Lara, you have to shock everyone awake.â€Â Hallie said in a firm, loud tone to focus her attention quickly.
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> Not to be outdone giving orders, Hatman quickly barked at Anna, “Anna, put some handcuffs on Marv so he doesn’t escape when he wakes up.â€Â
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> There was a bright flash of light, and everyone in the room gasped and shuddered, conscious and unconscious alike.
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> Hatman stumbled toward Marv, determined not to let the new mayor and former television psychic escape even in his weakened condition.
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> And Marv laughed.
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> “What’s so funny?â€Â Yuki Shiro asked angrily. She was still not happy about her condition during the dream.
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> “You think you can arrest me, do you? Look out the window.â€Â
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> Yuki stood and did as asked. She opened the curtains slowly, and looked outside, noting as she did that there seemed to be a lot of noise out there.
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> Just outside the gate of the Lair Mansion was a huge crowd of people with signs, cheering, with ‘We Love Marv’ and ‘Marv for Mayor’ signs.
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> “What the hell?â€Â Yuki whispered.
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> “You see now why I hired the Spin?â€Â Marv gloated triumphantly. “I have the Carnifex to thank for that. He set me up.â€Â
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> Yuki moved toward him. “I’ll give you what the Carnifex should have--â€Â
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> “If you give me so much as a black eye,â€Â Marv warned, “I’ll take it to television. The Lair Legion will be shut down.â€Â
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> “He’s right.â€Â Hatman agreed sadly. He frowned when he told Marv, “Fine, you win. Now get out of my mansion.â€Â
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> “Yeah. Last I checked this is international property under the jurisdiction of the United Nations.â€Â Yuki pointed out. “That means I can still throw you out.†ÂÂ
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> She grabbed Marv’s shoulder a little too hard and began herding him down the hall. The Lair Legion followed, mostly silently, except for CSFB! who was taunting Marv. He seemed to be taking it all rather calmly.
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> The three of them were stopped in the hall by Liu Xi Xian. She looked very angry as she blocked their way. Danny Lyle stood behind her, quietly amused and watching.
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> “We can’t harm him physically?â€Â she asked.
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> “Sorry Liu Xi, as much as I’d like to--â€Â Yuki began.
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> The Chinese girl opened the palm of her hand, and blew what looked like dandelion seeds in Marv’s face. “I curse you.â€Â she whispered softly. “Don’t set foot in this building again.â€Â
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> “We’ll see who’s cursed, young lady.â€Â Marv warned the Chinese girl as he passed.
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> When they opened the front door of the Lair Mansion, the cheering outside the front gate became deafeningly loud.
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> “Come on out with me.â€Â Marv invited Yuki. “If you’re nice, and you put in a big smile, I’ll tell them how much the Lair Legion wants to help this city.â€Â
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> Yuki calmly did smile, at which point she asked, “Do you know that old saying, ‘don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out’?â€Â
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> Then Yuki did exactly as promised. She slammed the door so that it hit Marvellous Marv in the rear end just as he stepped out onto the porch.
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> “Wish I’d thought of that one.â€Â Con Johnstantine supplied with a laugh.
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> “No more smoking in here either.â€Â Yuki took his cigarette and threw it to the floor, grinding it out with her boot. She didn’t see him light another one just as she walked away.
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> TO BE CONTINUED?
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> -- Story written and copyrighted (C) 2009 by Jason Froikin, and may not beÂÂ
> --  reprinted without permission. ÂÂ
> -- Yuki Shiro designed by Jason Froikin, based on designs by Masamune Shirow
> -- Liu Xi Xian and the Psychic Samurai are original design by Jason Froikin
> -- Lara Night is an original creation by Jason Froikin
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