Some time later, Ramona was finishing the morning update for the Baroness.

“Your ZOXXON Oil shares are up ¾ of a percent on the news from Arabia, and the secret take-over bid for Wilton Armaments is still stalled over that operating loss tax problem.“

“Tell Mr. Sneek that unless he gets moving on that, we’ll have to hire a Magic Circle firm for additional advice.”

“Won’t that be terribly expensive? Two sets of lawyers on the same problem?”

“Yes, but the only thing Sneek, Grabbit and Thuggery hates more than speed is seeing another law firm get paid.”

“I see,” Ramona murmured dubiously. To her thinking, two law firms meant that they’d argue with each other and run up the fees even higher.

Elizabeth Zemo sighed and took a last sip of the Blue Mountain coffee. “All right, let’s go over the appointments for today again.”

The cat girl focused on the laptop’s screen and began reading them off.
“In 15 minutes, the Diabolical Dr. Moo about those genetically upgraded soldiers. She says it’s an emergency. Then Franz and Frau Blucher on the plans for the Parodiopolis Garden Club reception on Saturday afternoon. At 9:30, 10 minutes with Velcro Vixen about last night’s attack on the Lynchpin’s arsenal. Then into the limo for your 10:30 meeting with Harry Flask at his tower. At 11:15 you have Don Antonio Vendredi at the Montepazzi Social Club down by the GMY docks. Then lunch with Velma Klein at City Hall. “

“Enough,” groaned the Baroness. “A whole morning doublecrossing GMY and being doublecrossed by them. Why did I get into that bog of frustration?”

“Could it be that you enjoy it?” offered Ramona.

“When I want psychoanalysis, Ramona, I’ll pay for it. Keep your mouth shut when I ask rhetorical questions.”

At that moment Velcro Vixen strutted into the solarium, long blonde hair cascading over a black leather catsuit with too many chrome buckles and studded straps. She strode over to Ramona and scratched her behind the ears, forcing the feline flunky into an involuntary purr.

Elizabeth was less happy. “You don’t belong here, yet. What’s the emergency?”

VV, unfazed, replied languidly, “No emergency, just an unexpected opportunity. You remember that tail we put on Visionary’s two brats?”

The Baroness paused for a beat. “Not really. . . . That’s still on? I thought we reported back to Camellia months ago.”

Vickie Vee smirked back at her employer. “I warned you that hiring the Indigo Imposter and Headcase as temps would be expensive. They just kept at it and kept submitting inflated timesheets. When the internal auditors finally noticed, last week, those two decided they had to make a score before you strung them up for stringing it out.“

“And why are you wasting my time with this exposition?”

The smirk returned to Velcro Vixen’s face. “So they did a snatch.”

Elizabeth blew up. “Are they freaking mad? Snatching Visionary’s whelps? They couldn’t think of a less dangerous plan, like inviting Galactivac for dinner? They’ve been unemployed for three years, and I’ll solve that right now by handing them over to Grandfather Otto for fun!” Her hand reached ominously for the disintegrator pistol on her right hip.

Even with that reminder about messengers with bad news, Vickie luxuriated for a moment with the knowledge that she was about to make the Baroness look foolish again. When the timing was right, she drawled , “Not Visionary’s moppets. A friend. A rich friend, from the look of her clothes and the places she took them.“

“And who might this friend be?”

“Some teenager called Featherstone. English, according to her passport. Visiting the Big Banana and the kids supposedly are friends – not related. Google says her parents are some sir and lady.”

“It’s still a bad idea to snatch friends of Visionary’s kids. The Legion will be here before we know it. Franz!”

The major-domo glided in, almost as if he had apparated. “Jawohl, meine edele Freiin?”

“You heard Velcro Vixen’s report?” He nodded. “Go to magenta alert. Secure the Schloss. Notify all the field teams. Now where is this teenager?”

“In the deluxe dungeon, Excellenz. The two freelancers brought her in five minutes ago. I took the liberty of sending her pastries and tea.”

“Good. At least someone’s on the ball here.”

Ramona attempted to break in, but the Baroness ignored her soft mew for attention.

“Vicky, get those two bunglers over to Baron Otto’s torture chamber.”

“Don’t you want to interrogate them first?”

“I don’t have time, and they clearly are a pair of ignorant fools. Let Grandfather have the pleasure.”

“Meeeow!” expostulated Ramona. “You’re late for Dr. Moo in the conference room! And you know how she gets” Nevertheless, the cat girl licked her lips at the prospect of some extra milk.

“Handle this, Vicki,” the Baroness ordered, as she grabbed her purse and headed for the solarium door, followed by Ramona.

Playing the part of a harassed Baroness Elizabeth Zemo: