This is a "Forest Week" story.

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In the foothills of Mount Hood, just outside of Portland, Oregon there are stories told of creatures that roam the area. Those that come into contact with said creatures meet a grizzly end. Now those in the know don't go out into to the woods on cretins days but traipsing through the woods were two visitors out for a hike.

"Brad?" Janet asked with some trepidation in her voice.

"Yes?"

"Can we go back to the car?"

"Why? Are you still thinking about what that old guy said at the Gas Station?"

"Well… yeah. He sounded really serious."

"As all old kooks do. Plus, his story didn't really make any sense."

"No. I'll admit some parts didn't but others did!"

"Like what? That there are intergalactic South American pack animals roaming these parts & they go around killing people."

"ok. That didn't really make much since."

"Or that they do it by sucking out your brains with the small straws you'd get with juices boxes?"

"That I kind of believed." Janet said which made Brad stop, turn around & give her a blank look of disbelief.

"What? I saw on the Discovery Channel once that things like that is possible."

"Sure, whatever." Brad said brushing off her comment like he'd done with many before.

As he started to hike on, He asked. "What about the last part? You really think those animals could get to the Chuck or Julie that quickly after our hypothetical deaths? Chuck is in Boston at College & Julie is traveling through Europe trying to 'Find herself' & waste her college fund."

"We don't know what kind of technology these Aliens have?"

This comment caused him to stop once more & face his wife of 24 years this November. He then condescendingly said "Really, Janet? Your really taking that old man's rambling as fact?"

"Everyone else seemed to belief him?"

"Well, Stupid abound in small towns. Bush did get elected twice, didn't he?"

"Actually only once. The first time was sort of a tie…"Janet started to say but Brad wasn't hearing it. He start to hike off without her.

As he hiked he complained out loud to himself. He couldn't belief that she was buying into the story, it was so stupid. It was so stupid it couldn't be truth. But Brad forgot that he lived in the Parodyverse!

Just then Brad heard a rustling of a few branches behind him, he thought little of it. "It's probably just Janet." He thought.

Then heard rustling from also in the other direct. "Who else is here?" He thought.

Then more rustling. Now in three directions. Four directions. Brad knew he should run but where? He was surrounded!

Then from out of the bushes, they came. They were Llamas, each one with a small bendy straw in their mouths. When Brad looked into their eyes he had only seen that look once before. It was that they had tasted human blood. He also knew that he'd probably never see Janet ever again. Then, felt a hand on his right shoulder.

"Janet?" He asked as he turned to see if it was her.

It was but she had already met the Llamas & this only his cold lifeless body propped up by one of the Llamas. Brad didn't have time to wonder how the Llama had moved Janet's arm because The Llamas were inching closer & closer, all while sucking in air through their straws.

Brad's last thought before his brain was sucked out was of that he was sad that he had never gotten a chance to do Megan Fox.

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The next day at Boston College of the Arts, the remains of a freshmen by the name Chuck was found. He was only identified his bloody ASB card. Oddly enough his time of death almost exactly matches up with his sister's death in the Swiss Alps. She was only identified by the fingerprints on her left hand, the largest most intact body part left of her. In both locations there were sightings of Llamas in the area.

THE END!