Tales of the Parodyverse >> View Post
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Post By
HH
In Reply To
L!

Location: Seattle, Washington
Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,038
Subj: I thought this was very well done.
Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 at 05:15:33 pm EST
Reply Subj: War is Heck!, a Moderator tie-in
Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 at 10:12:47 pm EST (Viewed 427 times)


>
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>
> The Moderator's Iowan Death Camp.
> Building 3a.
>
> All is not going well. Chaos seems to reign. The Legion is fighting off attacks from all sides. The call went out for the Agents of S.P.A.M. to come in help.
>
> "Alright, girls." Captain Gillespie as he paced back & forth in front of his battalion of young recruits.
>
> Once such recruit being that of Fred Harris. He wasn't sure he wanted to be there. Being back in his home state was bring up feeling he couldn't quite place. Since joining up he's had these thoughts. They've come more often since being back, thoughts of why did he even joined S.P.A.M., He never liked fighting. He' s a pretty peaceful kind of guy but there was just something about the name that for some reason just clicked with him.
>
> After a few minutes, The Captain yelled. "Harris!"
>
> "Yes, sir?" Harris said with a salute.
>
> Gillespie saluted back & then asked. "Have you been paying attention?"
>
> "Yes, sir."
>
> "Then what was the last thing I said before I addressing you?"
>
> Harris tripped over a few words before admitting to have not been paying attention.
>
> "Alright."
>
> There was some silence. Harris felt like flinching because he wasn't sure what Captain Gillespie was going to do to him, Harris had seen what the Captain had do to his "daughter".
>
> "I had finished addressing group & dismissed you all. But you continued to stand there."
>
> "Sorry, sir. It won't happen again."
>
> "Make sure of that. Now get out there & win one for The Moderator." Captain Gillespie said as he pushed Harris out the door & on to the field of combat.
>
> There was so much going on. Everyone was fighting someone, some were even fighting multiple people at a time. Harris was keeping to the outskirts of the fighting. His main goal was survive this battle & then see what happened.
>
> After few minutes at War, Harris dove out of the way of an incoming bolt of lightning. As he looked at the burnt crater just a few feet from him. He came to a decision he wanted to go home & he wanted to do it now. He much would have rather anywhere but there. He started to think about the safest way to the Motor pool.
>
> The quickest & most direct way was being blocked by some armored Horse man thing who was fighting off some of Harris' fellow S.P.A.M. agents, they were losing. They were being tossed here & there like rag dolls. So, Harris didn't want to go that way.
>
> The next easiest way was being blocked by the fighting between radioactive redneck & The Scarlet Lawnmower. Harris sure hopes he & no one else sees him sitting there, doing nothing. He's heard stories, none of them good, at what happens when you let down The Moderator & right now he was doing just that.
>
> So the two easiest ways to get to a motor vehicle are cut off because he'd didn't want to have to fight his way through them & he might die so the only way he'd actually leave the Camp is in a body bag. He stayed put for the moment. As he deciding on his next move, he sees some movement. On the backside of the buildings. People running. Running away. Prisoners escaping.
>
> Harris scrambles up off the ground & heads after them.
>
> Out by the outer fence, he sees them.
>
> "Halt!" he says commandingly or as commandingly he could must at that time. He has his taser drawn & pointed at the assailant.
>
> All but is left, They are standing with their back toward him. He can't see their face. All he knows is there appear female, is wearing an orange prison jumpsuit, a pair of over sized combat boots with little white skulls painted on them. The assailant also had short blond hair.
>
> "Ok. Put your hands up & Turn around. Slowly." Harris said.
>
> They did. Once Harris saw their face, he recognized her as Captain Gillespie's "daughter". She looked to have seen better days. She had a black right eye & split lower lip. There were a few other cuts & scrapes.
>
> "Ok." She said. She sounded angry. "Now what?"
>
> "Well, I'm going to return you to your cell."
>
> "Why?"
>
> Harris was almost caught off guard by the comment. It seemed obvious to him why.
>
> "Because your shape shifting space alien!"
>
> Kat made a sound of disgust. "You do know that's a sack of crap, right?"
>
> "No. It's the truth!"
>
> "Who's truth?"
>
> That question threw him off for a moment & then replied. "The Moderator said so. So, did you Father."
>
> "You know my dad?" She asked.
>
> "Yeah. He's my commanding officer."
>
> "Well, he is definitely commanding. I should know." Kat said to herself.
>
> Harris was find it hard to keep the Gun steady. His hands were getting sweaty & he was starting to feel the weight of the weapon.
>
> "Does he ever talk about me?"
>
> "Not regularly."
>
> "oh." she said.
>
> "But he did speak about you after your capture."
>
> "What did he say?" Kat said genuinely wondering.
>
> "He said that he daughter was missing & had been replaced by you."
>
> Kat raised her left eyebrow. "Me?"
>
> "Yes! You! You filthy Alien!" Harris yelled.
>
> Kat was noticing that his trigger finger was wiggling a bit.
>
> "So, I got a question for you..."Kat said & paused searching for a name. She found it. "..Harris."
>
> "No more questions!" He yelled waving the gun hastily in her direction.
>
> "This is the last one."
>
> "Ok. What is it?"
>
> "You've seen the Aliens, right?" Kat said as she lowered her arms.
>
> "Yeah, so?" Harris said, he wasn't yelling but it was still said louder then normal. He began to lower the gun a bit.
>
> "Do they look like the type of people aliens would want to impersonate so they could take down The Big M?" She said as she took a step forward.
>
> "Some. But, it's always who you least suspect!"
>
> "Now some of us do have a connection to The Big M but a loose connection. Not really the right foot you'd want to start off on if you want to do something to him."
>
> Kat took another step.
>
> "Yeah. But, you insulted him. Repeatedly!" Harris said at his normal volume. The gun came lower.
>
> "And I deserve to die because I used my right to free speech?"
>
> "Well, no. But your an Alien!" he said, the gun was at his side.
>
> "If I was this grand space alien & knew this form could get me arrested: do you think I would continue to use it?"
>
> "Well, no. Not if you were smart."
>
> Kat was now standing in front of Cadet Harris. They were looking each other in the eye. He could see that her eyes didn't look alien, a little blood shot but not alien. They looked warm & friendly.
>
> Kat took the stun gun from him & then asked. "Are you going to let me go?"
>
> "I don't know. I should turn you in but I also feel that I should let you go."
>
> "Thanks." Kat said & then kneed Harris in the groin.
>
> He grabbed that part of his anatomy as he fell over. Kat tossed the gun away & began to climb the fence. Through the pain, Cadet Harris could barely see her but he starred off in her direction. As Kat was midway up the fence she noticed that one of her boots was covered with a handful of cocktail weenies. She looked around at where they might of come from. No one was around except for the now past out S.P.A.M. agent & she would have noticed the meat product before then.
>
> As she climbed to the other side she felt sorry for the Kid, it seems that in another life he could have been a nice guy & them might of even been friends if they were ever to meet but they live this world where that is not an option.
>
>
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>
> Harris woke up a sometime later. He looked around, no one was there. He wiped the drool off his face, got up & made he was to the Motor Pool hoping that not every vehicle hadn't been destroyed. As he went on along, he started to think about what she had said. Her comment were in line with these dreams had been having . But he shook those thoughts from his mind. He needed to concentrate on survival. He had a life to get back too. One that didn't involve working for The Moderator.
>
>
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>
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THE END






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