Tales of the Parodyverse >> View Post
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Post By
HH
In Reply To
killer shrike

Subj: There goes my conviction that it was the Sorting Hat.
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2008 at 12:20:21 pm EST
Reply Subj: The Moderator Saga Part Twenty Four Continues: Birth (and Death?) of a Hero!
Posted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 at 11:47:46 am EST


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The Moderator Saga Part Twenty Four Continues: Birth (and Death?) of a Hero!

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>
> Killer Flea was at the part of his plan where he was to yank off Flapjack's head and shotgun the geyser of blood that would follow when there was a commotion behind him. A flash of light and the trumpeting of horns echoed through the warehouse. The size-shifting exsanguinator turned in time to catch a sandal to its thorax.
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> "Monster, you're spree of parasitism is over!" the man in the Babylonian skirt hefted the robot bodily and hurled him into the open Dryer of Doom. Once Killer Flea clanged inside the figure rushed to slam the hatch and lock it.
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> After making sure he had the correct number of limbs Flapjack sat up, "That wasn't nearly as much fun as I would have thought."
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> His rescuer heard the butler, and quickly rushed to his side, "Marduk's beard! You're alive?!"
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> "In a fashion," Flapjack examined one of his wounds with a probing finger.
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> "You look as though you have been chewed up and spit out by Tiamat herself!"
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> "You're one to talk," the Carpathian examined Functionary's new duds derisively, "Nice hat. You a Longhorns fan now?"
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> "I am the Neglected One. I have manifested at this moment in history to strike down the forces of tyranny that plague the world."
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> "Great. You might want to go check up on the others, since that French pig guy has been screaming 'A Bomm! A Bomm!' for the past minute."
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> Indeed, Brap seemed to be in full Clouseau mode, wandering about the warehouse in hopes of finding sturdy shelter. Helen Mcallister studied the explosive fretfully.
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> "I can't find any way to open it! How can a disarm it?"
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> Brap screamed from inside the hallowed out head of an Obliterator robot, "You can't! It izz a fail-zafe device zet to detonate zoon after detection. And it iz nucleair!"
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> "Zoon?" Mouse yelped, "How soon?"
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> Before Helen McCallister could get her answer a familiar man in a woven skirt and a cow-headed helmet floated into view. He carried what appeared to be the corpse of Flapjack, at least until the twisted butler raised his head enough to get a good look at Muffy's unconscious form.
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> "Naked," he said with some approval, "Finally!"
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> "Give me this 'bomm'," the Neglected One commanded.
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> "Functionary? Is that you?"
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> "Now's not the time to get reacquainted," Flapjack said, "Just do what he says."
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> Reluctantly, Mouse handed the explosive over to her old friend in his new wardrobe, "What are you going to do?"
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> "Cast this abomination into the dominion of Nergal!"
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> And with that, the Neglected One flew, through the roof of the warehouse, past the spires of the city, up past the cloud cover of the eastern seaboard, to the edge of earth's gravitational pull. His eyes scanning for the fiery red sphere that the god of war and death made his home. Finding his target, he cast his arm backwards, the bomb firmly in his grasp, ready to throw the devilish device to where it could do the least amount of damage.
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> Then there was the explosion, and things quickly became unclear.
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> To Be Continued





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