NOTE: This chapter continues directly after "
Adventures in Parodyverse - Saving the Future Part 5.1"



Hatman pulled his Communicard out from his pocket and thumbed the panel that would contact Hallie. A 3 inch high holographic projection of the Lair Legion's computer specialist materialized from the face of the card.

"Hallie, please release Drury from Danny's containment cell, then convene a meeting of the Lair Legion, all support staff and guests in the main conference room. Immediately." Normally Hallie would make a comment about Hatman being rude, but something in the Legionnaire's voice told her this was one time where it would fall on deaf ears.

He'd switched into full crisis mode.

"I'll take care of it," she said before her image winked out.

"What do you mean you're letting Drury out!" Yuki exploded. "I was trying to prove a point!"

Hatman stared down the cyborg P.I. for a moment before responding. "Meeting in the conference room," he replied cooly before storming back down the hall to the containment cell.

Yuki was about to follow when the projection of Hallie returned, this time projected from a small data emitter in Yuki's wrist. Yuki didn't need to carry an actual Communicard.

"Not a good idea Yuki," Hallie advised. "Let it go this time."

Yuki glared at Hatman's back before turning to stomp to the conference room. Hallie winked out to inform the other Legionnaires of the impromptu conference.

* * * * *

Hatman entered the conference room, his hands clasped behind his back under his cape. All residents of the mansion were present, some more impatient than others. When their leader entered the room exploded with questions and comments from those assembled.

"Hatty, I really need to get back to my analysis of-"

"You should've backed my play-"

"Garrick snooping around-"

"Did we check the phone lines for microsopic intruders like in Identity Crisis #-"

"I tasted a normal amount of purple but I admit the smell of 78 was more like a 37-"

"Enough!" roared Hatman. The Legion all fell silent. They had never heard their leader so angry before.

"I called this meeting to get a point across." Hatman paused for a moment before continuing. His tone switched from righteous anger to cool and eerily collected considering his prior outburst "This team elected me to act as the team leader. I did not force myself upon you, nor did I take the position by force. So why don't you all let me do my job?"

Hatman paced at the front of the room as he continued. "Danny Lyle has been accused of eventually trying to conquer the Parodyverse. He has disappeared from his cell, and we are trying to find him. The Chronicler has alerted the world's governments, and both the US Government and SPUD are investigating on behalf of the United Nations."

"To date, I think the government has been reasonable. They want an outside presence to have a hand in the investigation to eliminate bias. It makes sense, and is standard practice for other law enforcement agencies."

CSFB! piped up. "C'mon Hatty, you know we can't trust that jerk Garrick-" he began to rant

"Dream, can it. Now." Hatman said dangerously. "For once, we are going to reverse roles. You are going to sit there quietly while I get to rant. Now cork it or get the hell out of my conference room."

Dream wasn't sure whether to be hurt or angry, but he settled back into his chair. The Legion was shocked; they had never seen Hatman act this way.

"Now then. SPUD has been authorized to head up the investigation into Danny's disappearance in conjunction with the US Government. I have been trying to cooperate, but every time I try someone steps out of line."

"They were going to arrest her!" Yuki shouted, rising to the defense of the absent Liu Xi.

"Well maybe if she hadn't pissed him off first he wouldn't have resorted to that!" Hatman exploded. "Drury was trying to work with us, and Liu Xi teleported us out of the room, flipping him the bird as we went. I don't blame him for being annoyed."

Hatman cut Yuki off before she could retort. "And then, while I'm trying to sort out the fact she bolted, you go and lock Drury in the containment cell! I get that you're a rebel Yuki, that you like to thumb your nose at the system, but dammit, you're part of something larger than yourself! Sometimes you have to think of the team before making some kind of immature point!"

There was a knock at the door, then Drury strode into the room. "What's he doing here?" accused Yuki, glaring at Drury.

Drury ignored her and addressed Hatman. "You about done?"

Hatman couldn't bring himself to look at the team. "Yeah, we're done."

CSFB! couldn't contain himself any longer. "What the hell is going on?" he demanded.

"I allowed Liu Xi to escape under my watch. A team member decided to incarcerate the head of SPUD while under my leadership. SPUD has agreed to allow the Lair Legion to continue to investigate Denial's disappearance, in conjunction with Drury. Yuki is not being arrested, nor is Liu Xi."

Hatman revealed the shackles binding his hands behind his back. "I am."

The room exploded in protest, and it was all Al B, Visionary, and Sergeant McHarridan could do to restrain CrazySugarFreakBoy! from leaping out of his seat.

"Quiet!" shouted Hatman. "As the leader of the team, I'm responsible for the conduct of the Lair Legion and all those who reside within the Mansion. SPUD has agreed to take only me into custody as a show of good faith until we can sort this all out."

"Nobody will attempt to break me out," Hatman looked squarely at CrazySugarFreakBoy! when he said that. "I'm putting Al B. in charge of the investigation of Danny's disappearance. CSFB! will be in charge of the field team should any emergencies arise. And Hallie will take over all of my administrative duties."

A pleading look broke through Hatman's expression of anger and frustration. "We need to prove we can work with the government. Please, for the good of the team, prove we can do that."

Hatman turned and left the room, the two SPUD agents waiting outside the door escorting him. Drury turned to address the assembled room before leaving. "I hope for all our sakes you listen to him. You don't want to know what Garrick's got planned if you step out of line on this one. For what it's worth, I don't like this anymore than you do." That being said, the SPUD commander left the room.

The assembled Legionnaires, Mansion guests, and support staff all sat there stunned by the recent turn of events. Nobody noticed a wisp of mist near the window waft down to ground level and solidify into Grace O'Mercy, the Night Nurse.

"We're a little late to break out Denial," she told Simon Maddicks. "And you're not going to believe what just happened."

To be continued

Go Hatty Go! Nice to see the guy flexing his leadership muscles, and be willing to take the hit others deserve.

I also really liked the way you encapsulated the personalities of the major characters with the rhubarb at the start of the team meeting. Identity Crisis indeed.

Now we just the scene where Jay is locked in the brig surrounded by all of his old enemies....

It's quite possible Yuki will need to find a new job soon.

Why? She's not fired, she's been reprimanded. It happens. Or are you saying she can't handle actually having to fall in line with the leader of the team?

`Hat~

No, but she's never seen him that angry before. It's almost like that was the last straw.

Using the team captain analogy to his leadership style it makes sense.


I know Dream hates that story but I thought it was relevant.


Ouch.

~Hat~

To be fair, he's on edge because everyone in the Mansion is a suspect, the team isn't cooperating with the government officials Hatman agreed to cooperate with, and he has a cosmic level problem on his hands. Liu Xi and Yuki's antics may have been the last straw before he snapped on the team, but not the last straw in regards to her team membership. Or isn't Hatman allowed to be the angry one for once?

~Hat~

He can be angry, but Yuki will take it personally. Not against him, but she will definitely re-evaluate things a bit. She might accept the possibility that she could be fired for this.

Getting myself arrested when leader would have been like a mini-vacation... free meals... time in the exercise yard...

Okay, so I'm thinking that wasn't Hatty's strategy in this. Personally, I liked him kicking some ass (while still remaining himself). It makes a great deal of sense that Hatty would chose this route to motivate the team and to deal with the authorities, especially after all of his time as the liaison to law enforcement.

Now to get him a big poster of Rita Hayworth to hang on his cell wall...

Good stuff! I hope you follow it up with some of what HH added in his chapter!

Notice how Drury said get me whatever I wanted? You could be swimming in crullers too.


He definitely understands why they need to cooperate.


We've been discussing what happens next, so just wait and see what comes up!

~Hat~