In case you didn't read any of the other parts or have forgotten what happened, here's a link to Part 1 & a link to Part 2

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It's 8:30 in the morning, about a half before the Goth Haven's City Hall opens it's doors to the public for that day's business but the building's 3rd Sub-floor is already a hive of activity. The only thing of any real report that is on that floor is one thing: The Morgue.

Now Chuck Stevens doesn't know this. He just thinks it's a just a normal Thursday morning. He goes his normal way into the building, which of course avoid anyone who might tell him what's going on but he became aware something was happening when he exited the elevator & was stopped by two rather large uniformed police officers. He was questioned about why he was there. He told them, showed them his ID badge. After some confirmation that he was who he was, they let him by.

That thing by the elevator has him worried. As he walked down the hallway, one question kept running through his mind: What happened here?

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He walked through the large black plastic doors & into the Morgue. he began to look around. At that moment there was the most people he'd ever seen in the Morgue. There were uniformed officers, people who looked to him like what Detectives would look like & a few others. Some people were followed by by men with video cameras. Another person was standing off to one side with someone Chuck was pleased to see: Catherine, the night morgue attendant.

Chuck gave a sigh of relief as he took off his jacket, he also listened in on what they were talking about.

"So, he kept what in the briefcase?"

"Glass Breasts."

"All right." The reporter said as wrote down a few things in their pocket sized notebook. "Go on."

"So, he was showing me his breasts..."

"You didn't think this was odd?" The reporter interrupted.

"Yeah. But, then I've seen a lot of weird stuff so this doesn't even make the top 10."

"All right. Go on."

"So we get on this tangent about the breasts, their size, who their modeled after.."

"Who are they modeled after?"

Catherine gave them a look.

"Sorry."

"It's ok. The breasts in question are, were, whatever modeled on the bosom of his wife."

"He's married?"

"Yeah. I was a bit surprised myself."

"So, your talking?"

"Yeah. He shows me this horrible picture of his wife, then he starts to hit on me. I turn him down stating that he's married. He says they have an 'open relationship' that only truly works in his favor."

"All right."

"So, we get to the reason why he was there."

"Which was?"

"I was getting to that." Catherine said given him the same look as before.

"Sorry. Continue."

"So, he & his goons were there for a body. Yeah, I know big shocker but the body in question was a former member of his grounds crew. Apparently he was having the sex with Bosses' Wife."

"The Sex?" The reporter said with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." Catherine said with a smile.

"So, how did the groundskeeper end up dead?"

"I don't know." Catherine with a shrug of the shoulders. "It never came up why. He just wanted the body."

"Why?"

"Not sure. He just wanted the body & wasn't beyond getting it by force."

"Did he threaten you?"

"Yeah. I told him I couldn't just let him have the body, I could loose my job. So, he then told me I could lose my life if I didn't give him the body."

"So what did you do?"

"I kneed him in the crotch."

"You what?" The reporter said shocked.

Chuck smiled & laughed a bit to himself.

"Yeah. He was close enough, so my knee meet his junk with some force behind it."

"Then what happened?"

"Well... he dropped his cane & grabbed the area in question. Then he fell over & began to moan, too."

"From the pain?"

"I guess so."

"What did the men with him do?"

"One covered that area with his hands while the other cover it with the briefcase."

"The one containing the breasts?"

"Yes."

"Then what happened?"

"They ran off."

"So, what happened to.." The detective said pausing to flip back a few pages to read something but Catherine stopped him looking by saying something.

"The Man with Glass Breasts?"

"Yes."

"I wheeled a gurney over to him & with some trouble, he wasn't the lightest of people, I got him on it."

"Did he try to stop you from moving him?"

"Yeah. But the fighting stopped after I elbowed him in the crotch. This would happen a few times. I attempt to pick him up, he'd fight me, an elbow to the crotch, no fighting, some moaning. I'd attempt to pick him up, some fighting, another elbow, fighting stops, etc., etc. After a times doing this stopped fighting me."

"So, where did you put him next?"

"Once I got him on the gurney, I strapped him down & wheeled him into our walk in freezer over there." Catherine said as she pointed over to the freezer where a few Officers where a standing around & in.

"Then what happened?"

"I locked him in. I didn't strap him down all that tightly, I just didn't want him falling off it, so he got loose pretty quickly but he was still locked in the freezer."

"Then you called the police?"

"Yup. It was a little hard to here the person on the other end with all his pounding on the door but I heard them ok." Catherine paused for a moment, then continued. "I guess this would have been easier if the Morgue was down at a Station instead of here."

"Yes, I've thought that, too. I guess they messed up the bit of city planning, but what can you do?"

"Nothing really, just live with it."

The two shared a small laugh.

"So, you know the rest." Catherine said.

"Yes." The reporter said closing up his notepad.

"Can I go?"

"Sure. I might need to get in contact with you later, are you leaving for a trips soon?"

Catherine thought for a moment & then said. "No."

"All right." The reporter said. Paused & then asked "Is the number you gave me the best number to reach you at?"

"Yeah."

"All right. You can go, have a nice day."

"You, too."

The Reporter walked over to the Freezer to talk over things with the Officers. Catherine walked over in the direction of Chuck. This was the first time she had noticed he was there.

"Oh. Hi!"

"Hi. What's going on?"

"There was a break in last night. Some nut job wanting a body. I prevented him from getting it. This probably would have been all over by now but the Police were having problems getting into the building, so they had to wait around for someone with keys." Catherine said with a small laugh to herself.

"You think this will make the news?"

"Maybe. But it'll probably be buried deep in some section no one reads."

There was a few moments of silence between them. Then Catherine said. "Well, it's been a busy night: I just want to go home & go to bed."

"I think you deserve it."

"Thanks, Chuck."

"Your Welcome."

Catherine took off her lab coat, then gathered up her jacket & her bag. She waved Chuck goodbye & left for the day. Chuck tried to get into his normal morning routine but was finding it what with all the Police around. During all this, one thought kept coming back to him "I wondered what else happens during the night shift?"

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THE END.

Remind me to never insist on anything with Catherine unless I'm wearing a good quality cup. A fun and different way to conclude the story, with multiple elbows and reporters and all. It certainly does make one wonder what else happens on that night shift...

Like what happened to the briefcase? Where they all arrested, and are the glass breasts now evidence? Did they end up broken?

Catherine meeting the Man with Glass Breasts may not make her Top 10 but it might be on her Top 20 & it would definitely be on her Top 100.

I was going to have the reporter make a joke about Him having glass junk but couldn't come up with a good enough so I didn't.


I think you'd be ok, I doubt Catherine would have any reason to kick Vizh down there: She doesn't even known him!


I wasn't sure how to end this then I thought: If a knee thrust to the groin work in the Moderatorverse, why wouldn't it work in the Parodyverse? Having what happened via her telling a reporter lets me sidestep the whole "Fight" scene which I suck at writing.


Well, most of the time it's boring as heck but there are those rare moments like meeting Hatman or The Man with Glass Breasts that keep Catherine around. Plus, who can beat a job where you get paid to just sit around?

The last it was seen with the goon named Tiny, what he did with it after he ran away is anyone's guess.


No. The Goons ran off, Their Boss was the only one arrested. Since his goons had the briefcase: The Breasts are not evidence. But since he no long has the Breasts, he'll now need to come up with a new name.


Since we don't know what Tiny did with them, their fate is currently unknown.

I have read the latest from Kirk (I think). I plan on reading the others, soon.

I think you should go read my story reply to The Phone of Doom.