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CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: The Moderator Saga: One More Day
Posted Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 07:04:21 pm EST (Viewed 441 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP

The Moderator Saga: One More Day

“Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” Dean K. Fox asserted to the friends and family members who had gathered in his low-rent, one-room apartment in Parodiopolis.

“That’s one of the reasons why your loved ones asked me to stage this intervention for you,” Dr. Maximillian Valium reminded the working-class nerd who was the secret identity of the former New Lair Legion member known to the public as CalmSereneFlunkyBoy…

“Whatever it is that’s troubling you, dearie, we’ll help you through it,” Dean’s frail, elderly Aunt Meg reassured him, “but please, stop insisting that you’re that awful CSFB… character! Why, if it were true, I don’t know that my heart could take it!”

“Yeah, seriously, daddy-o, that joke is about as uncool as Khrushchev,” disapproved William “Billy” Blake Jr., who had forgotten fighting Dean as the second Great Red Dragon, “especially since you know what that CSFB… crumb-bum did to my dad!”

“But … your dad is alive, like you, and leading that team of rogue hero hunters, the 1.21 Gigawatts!” Dean shook his head. “And you’re my mom, not my aunt … and as long as I was doing the right thing, you’d believe in me and support me, no matter what!”

“Dean, baby, I know you’ve been hurting since we broke up,” April Alice Apple sought to soothe him, “but these impossible dreams are hurting you even more. You say we got married, and even raised a kid together, but we’re way too young for any of that!”

“I say it because I remember it,” Dean insisted, “and even the stuff that we all remember the same doesn’t make any sense. How did Billy’s dad ever get roped into working for the government, if Billy never died, and his death never set off the sequence of events that drove his dad over the edge? What actually happened during my membership in the New Lair Legion, if they never knew my secret identity? And what about everything else that happened, with everyone else who knew that I was CSFB…? And … while I’m at it, why would a guy who can create his own Silly Suit out of Impossibilitium have to resort to selling photos of himself to the newspaper whose editorials attack him as a criminal?”

“As if I wouldn’t spot that day-glo menace a mile away, much less working as a freelancer in my offices,” scoffed J. Jonah Jerkson, publisher of The Daily Trombone.

“You’re the classic hard-luck hero,” Dr. Valium explained patiently. “People can relate to your unceasing uphill struggles and identify with your imperfect personality.”

Dean blinked and cocked his head to one side. “In this … reality, I’m a stupid, selfish, luckless, loveless loser who’s permanently frozen in post-adolescence, with no potential and no aspirations for future improvement,” he squinted sidelong at Dr. Valium.

“As The Moderator would point out, that makes you an ideal everyman,” Dr. Valium conceded with a chuckle. “You’re a perfect example for the average person to emulate.”

Dean startled everyone by whipping a pistol out of his waistband and waving it around.

“Snagged this from a mugger who’s been posing as me,” Dean growled through gritted teeth. “I still couldn’t stop him from getting away, though, or snatching one of my Sticky String Sprayers … and I never thought to cancel my credit cards, that he also stole, because apparently, it’s my lot in life to be written as an idiot,” he laughed brayingly.

“And what do you think you’re going to do with that, then?” Dr. Valium snorted dismissively. “Because you’re not going to shoot us.”

“Why not?” Dean shot back, as he cocked the gun. “It’s not like any of you are real.”

“But you don’t know that for certain, do you?” Dr. Valium discerned astutely. “And you’re too much of a hero to risk killing innocent people.”

“My real friends and family were the ones who made me a hero,” Dean snarled, as he pressed the barrel of the snub-nose to Dr. Valium’s forehead, “and you took them away.”

Dr. Valium didn’t even flinch. “The people here are the only friends and family you have left,” he spat out impatiently, “and this is just one more day in the rest of your life, so the sooner you learn to accept the sacrifices of living this life, the better off we’ll all be. It’s the only way that’s left to you.”

Dean lowered the revolver. “You’re right,” he finally flashed a serene smile, “except it’s not one more day, it’s the last day … but there is only one way left to me.”

And with that, he raised the Saturday night special to his temple and pulled the trigger.
__________

Dreamcatcher Kokopelli Foxglove jerked upright from the virtual reality simulator, as the bland pastels of his Impossibilitium Silly Suit flared to life as screaming neon.

CrazySugarFreakBoy! was back, and he was righteously pissed.

“The sleeper has awakened,” CSFB! grinned in gleeful outrage.

Dr. Valium and The Moderator barely had time to back up, as CSFB! tore through the security forces surrounding him in a fluorescent flash of vicious vengeance, and escaped from Herringcarp Asylum with almost insulting ease.

“You told me these treatments would keep him pacified,” The Moderator recalled.

“It should have been everything he ever could have wanted,” Dr. Valium breathed deeply, trying not to tremble, “but … he actually chose to commit suicide, rather than live out the life of his superhero idol. He’s such a willful contrarian that he was literally willing to die, just to … spite me. He must be the most hateful human being alive.”

The Moderator nodded. “And now, thanks to you,” he noted, “the most hateful human being alive is on the loose, and more dangerous than ever.”



killer shrike thought this was perfect otherwise


 Subject: You forgot to explain what happened to the twins born of the tryst between Izzy Shapiro and the Word. :) [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 08:37:09 pm EST

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows Vista

> The Moderator Saga: One More Day
>
> “Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” Dean K. Fox asserted to the friends and family members who had gathered in his low-rent, one-room apartment in Parodiopolis.
>
> “That’s one of the reasons why your loved ones asked me to stage this intervention for you,” Dr. Maximillian Valium reminded the working-class nerd who was the secret identity of the former New Lair Legion member known to the public as CalmSereneFlunkyBoy…
>
> “Whatever it is that’s troubling you, dearie, we’ll help you through it,” Dean’s frail, elderly Aunt Meg reassured him, “but please, stop insisting that you’re that awful CSFB… character! Why, if it were true, I don’t know that my heart could take it!”
>
> “Yeah, seriously, daddy-o, that joke is about as uncool as Khrushchev,” disapproved William “Billy” Blake Jr., who had forgotten fighting Dean as the second Great Red Dragon, “especially since you know what that CSFB… crumb-bum did to my dad!”
>
> “But … your dad is alive, like you, and leading that team of rogue hero hunters, the 1.21 Gigawatts!” Dean shook his head. “And you’re my mom, not my aunt … and as long as I was doing the right thing, you’d believe in me and support me, no matter what!”
>
> “Dean, baby, I know you’ve been hurting since we broke up,” April Alice Apple sought to soothe him, “but these impossible dreams are hurting you even more. You say we got married, and even raised a kid together, but we’re way too young for any of that!”
>
> “I say it because I remember it,” Dean insisted, “and even the stuff that we all remember the same doesn’t make any sense. How did Billy’s dad ever get roped into working for the government, if Billy never died, and his death never set off the sequence of events that drove his dad over the edge? What actually happened during my membership in the New Lair Legion, if they never knew my secret identity? And what about everything else that happened, with everyone else who knew that I was CSFB…? And … while I’m at it, why would a guy who can create his own Silly Suit out of Impossibilitium have to resort to selling photos of himself to the newspaper whose editorials attack him as a criminal?”
>
> “As if I wouldn’t spot that day-glo menace a mile away, much less working as a freelancer in my offices,” scoffed J. Jonah Jerkson, publisher of The Daily Trombone.
>
> “You’re the classic hard-luck hero,” Dr. Valium explained patiently. “People can relate to your unceasing uphill struggles and identify with your imperfect personality.”
>
> Dean blinked and cocked his head to one side. “In this … reality, I’m a stupid, selfish, luckless, loveless loser who’s permanently frozen in post-adolescence, with no potential and no aspirations for future improvement,” he squinted sidelong at Dr. Valium.
>
> “As The Moderator would point out, that makes you an ideal everyman,” Dr. Valium conceded with a chuckle. “You’re a perfect example for the average person to emulate.”
>
> Dean startled everyone by whipping a pistol out of his waistband and waving it around.
>
> “Snagged this from a mugger who’s been posing as me,” Dean growled through gritted teeth. “I still couldn’t stop him from getting away, though, or snatching one of my Sticky String Sprayers … and I never thought to cancel my credit cards, that he also stole, because apparently, it’s my lot in life to be written as an idiot,” he laughed brayingly.
>
> “And what do you think you’re going to do with that, then?” Dr. Valium snorted dismissively. “Because you’re not going to shoot us.”
>
> “Why not?” Dean shot back, as he cocked the gun. “It’s not like any of you are real.”
>
> “But you don’t know that for certain, do you?” Dr. Valium discerned astutely. “And you’re too much of a hero to risk killing innocent people.”
>
> “My real friends and family were the ones who made me a hero,” Dean snarled, as he pressed the barrel of the snub-nose to Dr. Valium’s forehead, “and you took them away.”
>
> Dr. Valium didn’t even flinch. “The people here are the only friends and family you have left,” he spat out impatiently, “and this is just one more day in the rest of your life, so the sooner you learn to accept the sacrifices of living this life, the better off we’ll all be. It’s the only way that’s left to you.”
>
> Dean lowered the revolver. “You’re right,” he finally flashed a serene smile, “except it’s not one more day, it’s the last day … but there is only one way left to me.”
>
> And with that, he raised the Saturday night special to his temple and pulled the trigger.
> __________
>
> Dreamcatcher Kokopelli Foxglove jerked upright from the virtual reality simulator, as the bland pastels of his Impossibilitium Silly Suit flared to life as screaming neon.
>
> CrazySugarFreakBoy! was back, and he was righteously pissed.
>
> “The sleeper has awakened,” CSFB! grinned in gleeful outrage.
>
> Dr. Valium and The Moderator barely had time to back up, as CSFB! tore through the security forces surrounding him in a fluorescent flash of vicious vengeance, and escaped from Herringcarp Asylum with almost insulting ease.
>
> “You told me these treatments would keep him pacified,” The Moderator recalled.
>
> “It should have been everything he ever could have wanted,” Dr. Valium breathed deeply, trying not to tremble, “but … he actually chose to commit suicide, rather than live out the life of his superhero idol. He’s such a willful contrarian that he was literally willing to die, just to … spite me. He must be the most hateful human being alive.”
>
> The Moderator nodded. “And now, thanks to you,” he noted, “the most hateful human being alive is on the loose, and more dangerous than ever.”





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: Feel free to riff on that in your follow-up. :) [Re: killer shrike thought this was perfect otherwise]
Posted Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 08:56:02 pm EST (Viewed 388 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP






killer shrike apologizes


 Subject: Given (spoiler's) status at the end of your chapter, what I had in mind really wouldn't work [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 11:04:47 pm EST

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows Vista

>
>
>





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: If nothing else ... [Re: killer shrike apologizes]
Posted Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 11:22:17 pm EST (Viewed 472 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP



Visionary


 Subject: Well, they obviously should have come up with something more believeable. [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 12:15:18 am EST (Viewed 4 times)

Posted with Mozilla Firefox 2.0.0.11 on Windows XP


Man, he sure does get shot in the head a lot. I mean, he's going to be giving Wonder Man a run for his money in the dying department. And we already know that he'd sleep with his sister...

A fun riff on Marvel's poor decisions, and a much welcome continuation of the Moderator saga!




CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: It was bound to be even less believable ... [Re: Visionary]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 02:29:32 am EST (Viewed 350 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP



Hatman


 Subject: I thought you were rather restrained in your parody of the event you hate so much :) [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 12:31:51 pm EST (Viewed 381 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP

> The Moderator Saga: One More Day
>
> “Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” Dean K. Fox asserted to the friends and family members who had gathered in his low-rent, one-room apartment in Parodiopolis.
>
> “That’s one of the reasons why your loved ones asked me to stage this intervention for you,” Dr. Maximillian Valium reminded the working-class nerd who was the secret identity of the former New Lair Legion member known to the public as CalmSereneFlunkyBoy…
>
> “Whatever it is that’s troubling you, dearie, we’ll help you through it,” Dean’s frail, elderly Aunt Meg reassured him, “but please, stop insisting that you’re that awful CSFB… character! Why, if it were true, I don’t know that my heart could take it!”
>
> “Yeah, seriously, daddy-o, that joke is about as uncool as Khrushchev,” disapproved William “Billy” Blake Jr., who had forgotten fighting Dean as the second Great Red Dragon, “especially since you know what that CSFB… crumb-bum did to my dad!”
>
> “But … your dad is alive, like you, and leading that team of rogue hero hunters, the 1.21 Gigawatts!” Dean shook his head. “And you’re my mom, not my aunt … and as long as I was doing the right thing, you’d believe in me and support me, no matter what!”
>
> “Dean, baby, I know you’ve been hurting since we broke up,” April Alice Apple sought to soothe him, “but these impossible dreams are hurting you even more. You say we got married, and even raised a kid together, but we’re way too young for any of that!”
>
> “I say it because I remember it,” Dean insisted, “and even the stuff that we all remember the same doesn’t make any sense. How did Billy’s dad ever get roped into working for the government, if Billy never died, and his death never set off the sequence of events that drove his dad over the edge? What actually happened during my membership in the New Lair Legion, if they never knew my secret identity? And what about everything else that happened, with everyone else who knew that I was CSFB…? And … while I’m at it, why would a guy who can create his own Silly Suit out of Impossibilitium have to resort to selling photos of himself to the newspaper whose editorials attack him as a criminal?”
>
> “As if I wouldn’t spot that day-glo menace a mile away, much less working as a freelancer in my offices,” scoffed J. Jonah Jerkson, publisher of The Daily Trombone.
>
> “You’re the classic hard-luck hero,” Dr. Valium explained patiently. “People can relate to your unceasing uphill struggles and identify with your imperfect personality.”
>
> Dean blinked and cocked his head to one side. “In this … reality, I’m a stupid, selfish, luckless, loveless loser who’s permanently frozen in post-adolescence, with no potential and no aspirations for future improvement,” he squinted sidelong at Dr. Valium.
>
> “As The Moderator would point out, that makes you an ideal everyman,” Dr. Valium conceded with a chuckle. “You’re a perfect example for the average person to emulate.”
>
> Dean startled everyone by whipping a pistol out of his waistband and waving it around.
>
> “Snagged this from a mugger who’s been posing as me,” Dean growled through gritted teeth. “I still couldn’t stop him from getting away, though, or snatching one of my Sticky String Sprayers … and I never thought to cancel my credit cards, that he also stole, because apparently, it’s my lot in life to be written as an idiot,” he laughed brayingly.
>
> “And what do you think you’re going to do with that, then?” Dr. Valium snorted dismissively. “Because you’re not going to shoot us.”
>
> “Why not?” Dean shot back, as he cocked the gun. “It’s not like any of you are real.”
>
> “But you don’t know that for certain, do you?” Dr. Valium discerned astutely. “And you’re too much of a hero to risk killing innocent people.”
>
> “My real friends and family were the ones who made me a hero,” Dean snarled, as he pressed the barrel of the snub-nose to Dr. Valium’s forehead, “and you took them away.”
>
> Dr. Valium didn’t even flinch. “The people here are the only friends and family you have left,” he spat out impatiently, “and this is just one more day in the rest of your life, so the sooner you learn to accept the sacrifices of living this life, the better off we’ll all be. It’s the only way that’s left to you.”
>
> Dean lowered the revolver. “You’re right,” he finally flashed a serene smile, “except it’s not one more day, it’s the last day … but there is only one way left to me.”
>
> And with that, he raised the Saturday night special to his temple and pulled the trigger.
> __________
>
> Dreamcatcher Kokopelli Foxglove jerked upright from the virtual reality simulator, as the bland pastels of his Impossibilitium Silly Suit flared to life as screaming neon.
>
> CrazySugarFreakBoy! was back, and he was righteously pissed.
>
> “The sleeper has awakened,” CSFB! grinned in gleeful outrage.
>
> Dr. Valium and The Moderator barely had time to back up, as CSFB! tore through the security forces surrounding him in a fluorescent flash of vicious vengeance, and escaped from Herringcarp Asylum with almost insulting ease.
>
> “You told me these treatments would keep him pacified,” The Moderator recalled.
>
> “It should have been everything he ever could have wanted,” Dr. Valium breathed deeply, trying not to tremble, “but … he actually chose to commit suicide, rather than live out the life of his superhero idol. He’s such a willful contrarian that he was literally willing to die, just to … spite me. He must be the most hateful human being alive.”
>
> The Moderator nodded. “And now, thanks to you,” he noted, “the most hateful human being alive is on the loose, and more dangerous than ever.”





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: You and I apparently ascribe differing levels of importance ... [Re: Hatman]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 07:57:48 pm EST (Viewed 404 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP



L!


Location: Seattle, Washington
Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,038
 Subject: I was reminded of at least 3 other stories while I read this... [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 09:09:56 pm EST (Viewed 384 times)

Posted with Apple Safari 3.0.4 on MacOS X

A JLA story from early on in Grant Morrison's run on the book, "For the Man Who Has Everything" by Alan Moore & an episode of Batman: TAS.

The Batman episode & Moores' story both dealt with the main characters' "hearts' desire" given to him in a dream like state.




CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: Very good. [Re: L!]
Posted Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 09:41:23 pm EST (Viewed 389 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP



Anime Jason 

Owner

Location: Here
Member Since: Sun Sep 12, 2004
Posts: 2,834
 Subject: It was obvious... [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 01:54:40 am EST (Viewed 348 times)


anime.mangacool.net (10.0.255.1)
using Apple Safari 3.0.4 on MacOS X (0.33 points)


CSFB!'s friend Lara Night would have been the first to point out that nobody is better at telling fantasy from reality than CSFB!. Their plan was doomed from the start. \:\)







CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: An astute observation. :) [Re: Anime Jason]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 02:02:03 am EST (Viewed 363 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP






Hatman


 Subject: No, I'm saying that considering your astronomical hate for OMD, I thought Dream's response was rather measured (in Dream-logic) :) [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 09:44:32 am EST (Viewed 402 times)

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 7 on Windows XP

> ... To the insulting implications of Marvel's efforts to reduce Spidey to a "hero" that the average fan can "relate to," as well as the fact that Dream was willing to kill himself just to say "fuck you" to such a diminished portrayal of a "hero." \:\)





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: Dude ... [Re: Hatman]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 01:39:59 pm EST (Viewed 414 times)

Posted with Mozilla Firefox 2.0.0.11 on MacOS X



HH


 Subject: Inevitable, like watching a train wreck in slow motion. [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 05:33:33 pm EST

Posted with Microsoft Internet Explorer 6 on Windows 2000

> The Moderator Saga: One More Day
>
> “Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” Dean K. Fox asserted to the friends and family members who had gathered in his low-rent, one-room apartment in Parodiopolis.
>
> “That’s one of the reasons why your loved ones asked me to stage this intervention for you,” Dr. Maximillian Valium reminded the working-class nerd who was the secret identity of the former New Lair Legion member known to the public as CalmSereneFlunkyBoy…
>
> “Whatever it is that’s troubling you, dearie, we’ll help you through it,” Dean’s frail, elderly Aunt Meg reassured him, “but please, stop insisting that you’re that awful CSFB… character! Why, if it were true, I don’t know that my heart could take it!”
>
> “Yeah, seriously, daddy-o, that joke is about as uncool as Khrushchev,” disapproved William “Billy” Blake Jr., who had forgotten fighting Dean as the second Great Red Dragon, “especially since you know what that CSFB… crumb-bum did to my dad!”
>
> “But … your dad is alive, like you, and leading that team of rogue hero hunters, the 1.21 Gigawatts!” Dean shook his head. “And you’re my mom, not my aunt … and as long as I was doing the right thing, you’d believe in me and support me, no matter what!”
>
> “Dean, baby, I know you’ve been hurting since we broke up,” April Alice Apple sought to soothe him, “but these impossible dreams are hurting you even more. You say we got married, and even raised a kid together, but we’re way too young for any of that!”
>
> “I say it because I remember it,” Dean insisted, “and even the stuff that we all remember the same doesn’t make any sense. How did Billy’s dad ever get roped into working for the government, if Billy never died, and his death never set off the sequence of events that drove his dad over the edge? What actually happened during my membership in the New Lair Legion, if they never knew my secret identity? And what about everything else that happened, with everyone else who knew that I was CSFB…? And … while I’m at it, why would a guy who can create his own Silly Suit out of Impossibilitium have to resort to selling photos of himself to the newspaper whose editorials attack him as a criminal?”
>
> “As if I wouldn’t spot that day-glo menace a mile away, much less working as a freelancer in my offices,” scoffed J. Jonah Jerkson, publisher of The Daily Trombone.
>
> “You’re the classic hard-luck hero,” Dr. Valium explained patiently. “People can relate to your unceasing uphill struggles and identify with your imperfect personality.”
>
> Dean blinked and cocked his head to one side. “In this … reality, I’m a stupid, selfish, luckless, loveless loser who’s permanently frozen in post-adolescence, with no potential and no aspirations for future improvement,” he squinted sidelong at Dr. Valium.
>
> “As The Moderator would point out, that makes you an ideal everyman,” Dr. Valium conceded with a chuckle. “You’re a perfect example for the average person to emulate.”
>
> Dean startled everyone by whipping a pistol out of his waistband and waving it around.
>
> “Snagged this from a mugger who’s been posing as me,” Dean growled through gritted teeth. “I still couldn’t stop him from getting away, though, or snatching one of my Sticky String Sprayers … and I never thought to cancel my credit cards, that he also stole, because apparently, it’s my lot in life to be written as an idiot,” he laughed brayingly.
>
> “And what do you think you’re going to do with that, then?” Dr. Valium snorted dismissively. “Because you’re not going to shoot us.”
>
> “Why not?” Dean shot back, as he cocked the gun. “It’s not like any of you are real.”
>
> “But you don’t know that for certain, do you?” Dr. Valium discerned astutely. “And you’re too much of a hero to risk killing innocent people.”
>
> “My real friends and family were the ones who made me a hero,” Dean snarled, as he pressed the barrel of the snub-nose to Dr. Valium’s forehead, “and you took them away.”
>
> Dr. Valium didn’t even flinch. “The people here are the only friends and family you have left,” he spat out impatiently, “and this is just one more day in the rest of your life, so the sooner you learn to accept the sacrifices of living this life, the better off we’ll all be. It’s the only way that’s left to you.”
>
> Dean lowered the revolver. “You’re right,” he finally flashed a serene smile, “except it’s not one more day, it’s the last day … but there is only one way left to me.”
>
> And with that, he raised the Saturday night special to his temple and pulled the trigger.
> __________
>
> Dreamcatcher Kokopelli Foxglove jerked upright from the virtual reality simulator, as the bland pastels of his Impossibilitium Silly Suit flared to life as screaming neon.
>
> CrazySugarFreakBoy! was back, and he was righteously pissed.
>
> “The sleeper has awakened,” CSFB! grinned in gleeful outrage.
>
> Dr. Valium and The Moderator barely had time to back up, as CSFB! tore through the security forces surrounding him in a fluorescent flash of vicious vengeance, and escaped from Herringcarp Asylum with almost insulting ease.
>
> “You told me these treatments would keep him pacified,” The Moderator recalled.
>
> “It should have been everything he ever could have wanted,” Dr. Valium breathed deeply, trying not to tremble, “but … he actually chose to commit suicide, rather than live out the life of his superhero idol. He’s such a willful contrarian that he was literally willing to die, just to … spite me. He must be the most hateful human being alive.”
>
> The Moderator nodded. “And now, thanks to you,” he noted, “the most hateful human being alive is on the loose, and more dangerous than ever.”





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: Imposing restrictive rules on Dream, and expecting him to obey them, can only lead to one outcome. [Re: HH]
Posted Tue Jan 22, 2008 at 05:37:41 pm EST (Viewed 360 times)

Posted with Mozilla Firefox 2.0.0.11 on MacOS X






jack


 Subject: I liked the intervention....especially w/Aunt Meg's statement. [Re: CrazySugarFreakBoy!]
Posted Thu Jan 24, 2008 at 10:30:10 am EST

Posted with Apple Safari 3.0.4 on MacOS X

> The Moderator Saga: One More Day
>
> “Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” Dean K. Fox asserted to the friends and family members who had gathered in his low-rent, one-room apartment in Parodiopolis.
>
> “That’s one of the reasons why your loved ones asked me to stage this intervention for you,” Dr. Maximillian Valium reminded the working-class nerd who was the secret identity of the former New Lair Legion member known to the public as CalmSereneFlunkyBoy…
>
> “Whatever it is that’s troubling you, dearie, we’ll help you through it,” Dean’s frail, elderly Aunt Meg reassured him, “but please, stop insisting that you’re that awful CSFB… character! Why, if it were true, I don’t know that my heart could take it!”
>
> “Yeah, seriously, daddy-o, that joke is about as uncool as Khrushchev,” disapproved William “Billy” Blake Jr., who had forgotten fighting Dean as the second Great Red Dragon, “especially since you know what that CSFB… crumb-bum did to my dad!”
>
> “But … your dad is alive, like you, and leading that team of rogue hero hunters, the 1.21 Gigawatts!” Dean shook his head. “And you’re my mom, not my aunt … and as long as I was doing the right thing, you’d believe in me and support me, no matter what!”
>
> “Dean, baby, I know you’ve been hurting since we broke up,” April Alice Apple sought to soothe him, “but these impossible dreams are hurting you even more. You say we got married, and even raised a kid together, but we’re way too young for any of that!”
>
> “I say it because I remember it,” Dean insisted, “and even the stuff that we all remember the same doesn’t make any sense. How did Billy’s dad ever get roped into working for the government, if Billy never died, and his death never set off the sequence of events that drove his dad over the edge? What actually happened during my membership in the New Lair Legion, if they never knew my secret identity? And what about everything else that happened, with everyone else who knew that I was CSFB…? And … while I’m at it, why would a guy who can create his own Silly Suit out of Impossibilitium have to resort to selling photos of himself to the newspaper whose editorials attack him as a criminal?”
>
> “As if I wouldn’t spot that day-glo menace a mile away, much less working as a freelancer in my offices,” scoffed J. Jonah Jerkson, publisher of The Daily Trombone.
>
> “You’re the classic hard-luck hero,” Dr. Valium explained patiently. “People can relate to your unceasing uphill struggles and identify with your imperfect personality.”
>
> Dean blinked and cocked his head to one side. “In this … reality, I’m a stupid, selfish, luckless, loveless loser who’s permanently frozen in post-adolescence, with no potential and no aspirations for future improvement,” he squinted sidelong at Dr. Valium.
>
> “As The Moderator would point out, that makes you an ideal everyman,” Dr. Valium conceded with a chuckle. “You’re a perfect example for the average person to emulate.”
>
> Dean startled everyone by whipping a pistol out of his waistband and waving it around.
>
> “Snagged this from a mugger who’s been posing as me,” Dean growled through gritted teeth. “I still couldn’t stop him from getting away, though, or snatching one of my Sticky String Sprayers … and I never thought to cancel my credit cards, that he also stole, because apparently, it’s my lot in life to be written as an idiot,” he laughed brayingly.
>
> “And what do you think you’re going to do with that, then?” Dr. Valium snorted dismissively. “Because you’re not going to shoot us.”
>
> “Why not?” Dean shot back, as he cocked the gun. “It’s not like any of you are real.”
>
> “But you don’t know that for certain, do you?” Dr. Valium discerned astutely. “And you’re too much of a hero to risk killing innocent people.”
>
> “My real friends and family were the ones who made me a hero,” Dean snarled, as he pressed the barrel of the snub-nose to Dr. Valium’s forehead, “and you took them away.”
>
> Dr. Valium didn’t even flinch. “The people here are the only friends and family you have left,” he spat out impatiently, “and this is just one more day in the rest of your life, so the sooner you learn to accept the sacrifices of living this life, the better off we’ll all be. It’s the only way that’s left to you.”
>
> Dean lowered the revolver. “You’re right,” he finally flashed a serene smile, “except it’s not one more day, it’s the last day … but there is only one way left to me.”
>
> And with that, he raised the Saturday night special to his temple and pulled the trigger.
> __________
>
> Dreamcatcher Kokopelli Foxglove jerked upright from the virtual reality simulator, as the bland pastels of his Impossibilitium Silly Suit flared to life as screaming neon.
>
> CrazySugarFreakBoy! was back, and he was righteously pissed.
>
> “The sleeper has awakened,” CSFB! grinned in gleeful outrage.
>
> Dr. Valium and The Moderator barely had time to back up, as CSFB! tore through the security forces surrounding him in a fluorescent flash of vicious vengeance, and escaped from Herringcarp Asylum with almost insulting ease.
>
> “You told me these treatments would keep him pacified,” The Moderator recalled.
>
> “It should have been everything he ever could have wanted,” Dr. Valium breathed deeply, trying not to tremble, “but … he actually chose to commit suicide, rather than live out the life of his superhero idol. He’s such a willful contrarian that he was literally willing to die, just to … spite me. He must be the most hateful human being alive.”
>
> The Moderator nodded. “And now, thanks to you,” he noted, “the most hateful human being alive is on the loose, and more dangerous than ever.”





CrazySugarFreakBoy!


Member Since: Sun Jan 04, 2004
Posts: 1,235
 Subject: I preferred CSFB's! response to it, myself. ;) [Re: jack]
Posted Fri Jan 25, 2008 at 03:13:54 am EST (Viewed 404 times)

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